Happy New Year!
As 2012 begins, I once again pledge to drink more water, exercise more and eat less bad stuff. Yes, I have resolved to do all three of these things multiple times in the past, but I’m sure that this year I’ll finally find the strength to fulfil all of my healthy goals – at least for a bit longer than the mere week I lasted in 2011. If not, there’s always wine to help drown my sorrows in and kids to help keep me young and in shape (ever tried to catch a four-year-old at full speed on a scooter?) Here’s to all of you fulfilling your own resolutions and to having a very healthy and happy 2012.
NB: This will be my last blog entry for a while as I’m going in for shoulder surgery on Wednesday and will be down to one arm for quite a few weeks. Luckily for me, the kids never stop saying funny stuff, so I’ll have plenty of things to add when I’m back at it! In the meantime, enjoy.
A discussion about poverty
Marley: Some people don’t even have clothes and they are outside and their girl bits and boy bits are hanging out and they are so cold.
Pierce: Some people don’t even have houses and have to drink dirty water and walk around with their weenises hanging out and they are embarrassed.
Marley: Some people die from that.
Pierce: From people seeing their weenises?
Marley: No, from drinking dirty water.
Heroes – big and small
Pierce: I really wanted to be born after Marley, you know why? Because little people can be heroes.
Mom: Big people can be heroes, too.
Pierce: But big people can’t fit into little holes.
Me: What kind of little holes?
Marley: Like if you have a house with a little secret hole and your cat gets stuck in it.
Pierce: I could fit in that hole and save it.
Mommy vs. House
Marley: I think it matters more to have a mommy than a house. So if I was poor and I could only afford a house or a mommy, I would buy a mommy.
Mom: You don’t buy a mom.
Marley: I didn’t mean that. I meant if I could only have a mommy or a house I would choose the mommy.
Marley: I need to go to university because in university I will find my husband. When you meet your boyfriend in university then you get married, but if you meet your boyfriend before university, then you can’t get married.
Dad’s Christmas wish
Dad: You haven’t asked what I want for Christmas.
Pierce: But we don’t have any money.
Dad: Well, I want a helicopter.
Pierce: I can’t get you a real present. How about army men because I have army men that your army men can play with.
Marley: I know what you want, Dad. To go and get your hair done with me.
Is Santa real?
Marley: Mom, I don’t think Santa is real?
Mom: Why not?
Marley: Because I’ve never seen him.
Mom: I’ve never seen him either, but presents still arrive each Christmas morning.
Pierce: If you don’t believe in Santa, he won’t give you any presents.
Marley: Oh, well I guess I believe in him then.
Meema: What did the Wisemen bring to Jesus?
Marley: I don’t remember.
Mom: Gold, fr..
Mom: Not furniture, franken…
Dad: Does your stomach really hurt? What does it feel like?
Pierce: It feels like I ate chocolate that was too minty.
Faith talk in a Cathedral in Geneva, Switzerland
Pierce: Shhh! Be quiet and you might hear God.
Pierce: When Jesus died on the cross, how did he come back to life again?
Mom: God brought him back to life.
Pierce: How did he do that?
Mom: He’s magical and all powerful. Some people believe he can do anything.
Pierce: Like he can make people sick and he can make Christmas trees?
Pierce: Can he make artificial Christmas trees?
All I need is love…
Marley: Mom, I love you.
Pierce: Mom, I love you all the way up to God and Santa and then another nine million and then back. That’s how much.
God vs Santa
Marley: Can Santa see God?
Mom: I don’t think so.
Marley: Can God see Santa?
Pierce: Marley guess what was in my mail?
Pierce: Nothing. Just junk. They were trying to make me buy things like houses and a gym but I’m not going to. Ha! I’ll show them.