The joys of motherhood

Being a mom is definitely the most difficult job I’ve ever had. It’s filled with mundane tasks (diaper duty, laundry, cooking, dishes, the list is endless), thankless duties (see previous list) and sleepless nights. But motherhood is also the most rewarding experience I’ve ever been a part of.

Sure, every mother has days when she feels underappreciated (“Why did you make chilli? You know I don’t like chilli), unloved (“You are sooo mean. When I grow up I’m moving to a different country”) and unneeded (“”You don’t need to take me up to the classroom anymore. I’m big now so just give me a quick kiss and then go away.”)

But luckily for us, we have even more days where we feel like the Queen of the world. Those moments filled with impromptu cuddles and innocent proclamations of love are enough to refuel any overworked and overtired mom. Their hilarious comments help us to laugh when we’re cranky and their endless supplies of energy are contagious — who would have thought we’d be playing hide-and-seek, cramping our ageing joints in too-small hiding spaces at 35?

Even when we’ve had a rough week, the kids will make everything better with just one look, kiss or sentence. Just yesterday, Marley said, “Mom if we didn’t have enough money and I had to choose between having a house and a mommy, I’d buy you.”

Then, as I tucked Pierce into bed he said, “Mom, I love you more than you love me.” “Not possible,” I replied, kissing the dimple on his cheek, “because I love you a million gazillion.” As I got up to leave his room, he said, “Well, you’re the best mommy and I love you a million gazillion cotillion. So I win.” I puledl the door shut, a smile on my face and new warmth in my heart, knowing that it really is me who has won after all.

Gay marriage
Pierce: If I was in that country where boys could marry boys, then I would marry Bryce. No. Oliver. Oliver because he got three cheeky monkey stickers at school today for being so good.

Getting noticed
Marley: Mom, this is my trick for boys to like me. [She bats her eyelashes, smiles slyly and turns to look the other way]. Then they laugh and they like me.
Mom: What boys are you trying to get to like you?
Marley: Victor. Victor is my boyfriend and Bryce. If Bryce doesn’t marry me then I’ll marry Victor.

Modesty at the doctor
Marley: Pierce, do you know what? Sometimes even though you’re not really supposed to do it, you have to show your bottom to the doctor. So that means you have to show your bum to the vet.
Mom: The vet?
Marley: I mean doctor. But if you have a sick dog or a cat you will have to show its bottom to the vet.

Who makes babies? Marley: Mom, when you get married, do you have to have a baby?
Pierce: No. You don’t have to. You don’t have to make babies born if you don’t want. But you can’t just make babies born.
Mom: Why not?
Pierce: Because God makes babies born, not you.
Mom: Pierce, a mommy and a daddy make a baby and then the mommy gives birth to the baby.
Pierce: No. Wrong. Absolutely wrong. Who lives up there (he points to the ceiling)? God lives there. God makes the baby. He even made you and me and Marley. He made everyone. If you don’t believe in God, he won’t know you.
Mom: How does God make babies?
Pierce: He has magic.
Mom: Where did he get His magic from?
Pierce: He went to see someone because he was helping people and that man gave Him magic.

Mom’s the best, kind of

Pierce: Mommy, you are the best, well almost the best. You know who is so close to almost being as nice as you?
Mom: Who?
Pierce: Maxim.
Mom: Really? Why?
Pierce: Because she shared her snack with me and she gave me the whole piece.

Massages
Pierce: Massages are supposed to be strong and hard and you rub wherever you feel bone except for my face.

The meaning of mother
Pierce: You are my mother. You are not my servant. I just said that because I am remembering it.

Animals and extinction
Dad: What was your favourite animal in The Lion King?
Pierce: You might think it’s the giraffe because most people like the giraffe, but I like the hippo because not many people like the hippo. There used to be so many hippos, but now there aren’t many hippos. So we should give money to them.

Marley’s new favourite artist
Marley: Can I draw a picture like Pablo Pistachio?

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